A few years after graduating I was asked by my college to give a talk on 'top tips for post-college life' to a bunch of seniors. Here it is (easiest listed first!).

Tip #1: Get a real email address.
Sorry, sportychick1234 just isn't going to cut it. First try [email protected]. If that's taken, throw in your middle initial before resorting to adding numbers to the end.

Tip #2: Perfect your Resume and LinkedIn.
Job searching is hard. It sucks. And if you don't have an amazing Resume and LinkedIn profile, it's going to really suck. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Treat job searching like long-term dating. It has to be a good fit for both you and them. Tips: Resumes need to be 1 page. If you've listed Microsoft Office and/or Facebook as skills, take that shit off right now. Good rule of thumb: if a 6th grader can do it, don't put it on your resume. Ask your peers, parents, friends, and coworkers to give you harsh feedback on your resume. Never put anything that isn't true. But yes, list your accomplishments and be darn proud of them. Remember internships are just as important as your coursework and make sure to highlight your tangible contributions. Make sure everything that you have completed is in past tense. Pro tip: family friends make great people to connect with on LinkedIn to start. Have a goal to get to 200+ connections by your 2nd year after college. Remember that networking is 95% about how you can connect and help other people. Then when you need it you will have an amazing group of people in your network. 

Tip #3: Keep living like a college student. 
After getting your first job, you now have this green paper stuff and can buy things! Ooh look I can buy a car, get my own apartment, and spend tons of money on everything I don't need! Yes, yes you can. Don't. And I'm begging you, don't spend more than you earn. It will be an odd adjustment not being in college surrounded by your friends; living alone will make this worse and also kill your finances. Live with as many roommates as possible. Learn to go grocery shopping and cook instead of eating out. You should definitely spend money on things like your favorite band's concert and traveling to see family/friends. But always remember the best things in life are free. Watch the sunset. Go for a walk downtown. Ride your bike to work. Go camping. Go to the park. Read a book at the library. Spending money on things will not make you happy. Doing things, especially new things, with friends and family are what really matters. For a full dose of financial badassity, check out Mr. Money Mustache.

Tip #4: Max out your 401k, HSA, and Roth IRA.
I highly recommend maxing out your 401k, HSA, and Roth IRA every single year. I realize this is completely infeasible for many given student loan burdens and other things, but it is something to definitely keep in mind. I had no idea what a 401k was when I graduated. Couldn't tell you the difference between a small cap and large cap stock. Didn't know what Roth was or what an IRA entailed. But that is ok! Actually, that's completely normal. 

So your homework is to set a timer for 10 minutes and look up what a HSA is. Spoiler alert: it's a magical place you can put tax-free money and it grows tax-free and you can use it to pay for medical expenses. Then 1 week later set a timer for 10 minutes and look up the 401k options your employer offers. If there is a Target 20XX fund, throw your money in there. You can always change it later. At the very least put the % into your 401k that your employer matches. You are literally throwing away free money if you don't. And lastly, if you have extra money leftover after maxing out your HSA and 401k, put it into an IRA. When you are young and in a low tax bracket the Roth IRA is a good choice. Vanguard ETFs are great because they have a fantastic variety of options and the lowest fees around. 

Tip #5: Get your personal finances in check. 
- Step 1 (5 minutes): Go to annualcreditreport.com (sounds sleazy but it's actually the only real one). You are entitled to get your credit report from the 3 major credit reporters every single year. Do it. See where you're at. Make sure there is nothing incorrect. Set a reminder to do this every year. Bonus: Sign up for Credit Karma (cost: free; time: <5 min) which gives you free credit monitoring. And if you have no credit, now is the perfect time to start building it. Hint: always pay off your credit card balance in full each month. Always. Always. Always.

- Step 2 (30 minutes): Sign up for Mint.com (also free!). This is where you will see your entire financial picture all in 1 place. Link your bank account(s), credit card(s), student loans, 401k, HSA, IRA, car (loan), etc. From there you can also create a monthly budget. Easy peasy to start with the following categories: Rent, Necessities, Fun, Food, Car (insurance, taxes, gas, maintenance). Just approximate for now. Then once a month set a reminder and track where you're at. You will be in the top 1% of the population by having a monthly budget and tracking your finances, and well on your way to financial freedom.

Tip #6: Have a sense of what your ideal workplace and job looks like. 
- Step 1: List your job non-negotiables. Mine included things like not more than 500 miles from my family, not somewhere really cold, not somewhere I had to wear a monkey suit every day, less than 5% travel, and not somewhere in the middle of effing nowhere. Think about what is important to you and write it down. Stick to it. 

- Step 2: Take a look at job posts of jobs you think you would like to have in 5+ years and list the common job requirements. Look for the requirements that keep popping up. List them off in order of importance. You probably won't have any experience in any of them. Challenge accepted. Go get 'em. 

Tip #7: "I have to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life."
OH MY GAWD NO YOU DON'T. You really don't. First of all I can guarantee you that you won't do 1 thing for the rest of your life. Second I can guarantee you would be really freaking awesome at thousands of things. So STOP WORRYING. If you are utterly lost, first know you are in great company. Then start with a simple list of a few things you don't like. Then a few things you are good at. Sweet. Now list a few things you'd like to learn. Now a few things you'd like to try. THEN JUST GO TRY ONE! If you don't like it - great, now you know. If you do like it - super, keep going until you don't like it anymore. But that day will come. And it will be awesome and scary and fun.

Tip #8: Racism, Sexism, Fraud, etc unfortunately still exist. Be aware. Say something.
I would love to think it's the twenty first century and adults can get over our stupid differences that exist on the outside. But unfortunately, not all adults act like adults. Don't be surprised when you see it. In fact you should be looking out for it. And you damn well better call it out. If your manager doesn't seem to care, work your way up calling it out. If the CEO doesn't care, then quit and call CNN. Don't do anything that you wouldn't want broadcasted on the front page of the New York Times. Trust your instincts. If you are ever uncomfortable, run away and don't look back. 

Tip #9: Learn what Emotional Intelligence is and make it your #1 goal to master.
It's really sad that Emotional Intelligence isn't taught in every school along with reading, writing, and math. From my experience in the workplace it is more important than the other 3 combined. I don't expect you to have even heard the term before, but you need to make it your #1 priority. It will help you in all aspects of your life: family, work, and relationships. Quick overview: we are the descendants of nervous monkeys. Quickly recognizing and responding to threat was a major survival advantage for millions of years. However, starting with agriculture about 10,000 years ago, technology has resulted in not needing to be nervous monkeys all the time. However, evolution has not had time to catch up and the primitive parts of our brain still take over in stressful situations. And unfortunately, this reaction masks the parts of the brain that control creative thinking and collaboration. As you can imagine, this is mostly destructive in all work and personal situations.

The good news is, like all things in life, this is something you can get better at with practice. You will frequently find yourself in conflict solutions. Take a deep breath. Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to really understand where they are coming from. And most importantly, if you lose your cool (or are heaven forbid ever wrong about something in your life), immediately put on a smile and say "My bad! Wow I really messed that up!" and learn to do better next time. It is only those who never admit they are wrong that look like idiots. Spoiler alert: you are wrong and will be wrong about zillions of things. Embrace it and keep learning. 

Tip #10: My [mom/dad/insert adult here] wants me to be X. But I want to be Y. What should I do?
It's pretty simple actually: you're an adult now and can make your own damn decisions. I say be the best effing Y you can be. Everyone I know that wanted to follow their passion but instead did x/y/z because their mom/dad/professor wanted them to... welp guess what. They were super unhappy. Then years later they had a quarter to mid life crisis, and went to do what they always wanted to do, but were years behind. If you want to live in a foreign country, go do it. If you want to do something that may not make you a bazillionaire, go do it. If you really love something you will find a way to make ends meet and most of all you will be happy.

Congratulations on your recent graduation! Take this time to be proud of yourself; graduating college is an impressive accomplishment and you have worked very hard to get here.

That being said, school doesn't teach you everything. In fact, many things that were drilled into my brain for 20 years were actually counter-productive to a happy post-college adulthood.

Let's start with the biggest culprit: Failing is bad.

Truth: Failing is great. In fact, failing is the #1 thing you should strive for. You should strive to fail every single day. In fact, multiple times a day is ideal. You should fail so frequently that it becomes the norm. Why? Because you won't ever be your most successful self without trying new things, pushing yourself, and inevitably, failing all the time.

When I was younger I didn't push myself, apply myself, or get out of my comfort zone because I was afraid of failing. I was afraid of not getting into prestigious colleges so I didn't apply to any. I was afraid of getting rejected so I didn't ask someone out. I was afraid of not making the cross country team so I didn't show up to tryouts. I was afraid of looking dumb so I didn't attend improv classes. Everything I did was safe and without fear of failure. And that left me to stay in my comfort zone, where nothing really changed and I stopped growing as a person.

The good news is that failing, along with everything else in life, is something that you can practice. Aim to fail miserably at one thing right now. How about pushups to failure? Whether it is 2 or 200, you will fail at some point. How you feel when failing will tell you how much you need to work on strengthening your fail muscle (and your arm muscles too!). But when you do pushups every morning for the next week or two, before long instead of "ah crap I hate pushups this sucks and I'm going to suck at it" your attitude will transform into "34 pushups, alright! That's 5 more than yesterday."

One question I always ask when interviewing is "tell me about a recent time where you failed at something." This question is an uncanny predictor of those that get hired: "Haha just one recent thing? I can't even pick...." vs "Ummm.. can't think of anything. I'm awesome." No, you aren't; you just told me you don't challenge yourself and guess what - I'm not hiring you.

TLTR: Failing is not only a good thing but the key to growth in all aspects of life. Make an effort to do something every single day that you will completely and utterly fail at. It will be scary. It won't be fun at first. In fact it may completely suck. But keep at it and it will be 100% worth it. Now go do some pushups.